Foreign motorists

I’m a pacifist at heart. The non-violent type, this is what I truly believe in. But in this walk of life, in this day and age, where do we draw the line? It’s not always so easy to turn the other cheek. But what do we do? How far do we go? Do we bring back capital punishment? I’ve asked myself this question many times, and only now have I found the answer – yes. Yes we should. And for one reason and one reason only… for people who park outside-the-marked-bays!

You go to work, they’re there! You go to Tesco, they’re there! One car, two spaces, and I die a little inside… It’s the equivalent of sitting on the bus with your feet up on the seat next to you, “Yeah, this is me. This is how I sit. Good thing no-one was here otherwise I’d have no place to put my feet!” These people just plain don’t-know-how-to-park. Or even where to park. When to park. Why we park! Anything goes as far as they’re concerned! And let’s not stop there, because you want to know who these people are? These are the same people who don’t know when to signal. Why to signal. Where to signal, how to signal! And based on my observations, my investigations, my analysis, the perpetrators can be classed into one of two categories: boy racers, and anyone whose car smells like ethnic food!

Now don’t get me wrong, I welcome foreign culture. Foreign food, foreign clothes, foreign language. Give me the works. But foreign motoring skills? Declare that shit at customs when you enter the country!

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